![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgkP1l5EPJnF0OUy1du95LqduF2gg1wYI5cxi9CalwzHTMHwUiFGZHIoK_HFYrpifXAr_-qxhSEORZpujNMP7zyXPoG3Alyfd8Hudm1VHm1nVQcc2rbGrvwf-mkCfzuRR77aMMaVUL-TGK/s400/Boxer-American.jpg)
In the fight against good taste, these beers are the champs.
I’m a Yard Beer Anthropologist. Or I would be, if that was actually a thing and not something dumb I invented to justify my weakness for trying beers I should really know better about.
The latest two are Boxer Light and American. Before I came across them in the liquor store, I’d never heard of either one, but I was intrigued by both.
Boxer Light comes in an industrial-sized 36-pack -- a full six beers more than the now instantly passé, hopelessly inferior 30-pack. American makes the ballsy claim that it’s “Unofficially, the official beer of the United States of America.”
So what was I supposed to do? Not buy them?
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And why a crown for the Boxer Light logo? Shouldn’t it be boxing gloves or Rocky or something? There’s a Boxer dog on the website and they ran a contest to give away 1,000 pairs of boxers, but that still doesn’t solve the mystery of the crown.
Maybe it’s a reference to the Boxer Rebellion. If so, they should put some historical cartoons or educational puzzles on the box. Because I’ll be honest, I just had to Wikipedia the Boxer Rebellion to find out exactly what it was.
Some may argue having games and comics on the box would be marketing to minors. I say go ahead and do it. At worst, the kids might learn something -- it’s not like they’ll be able to choke back more than half of one of these anyway.
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Still, it’s the winner over Boxer Light. Don’t get me wrong, American tastes just as bad, but it doesn’t have the curdling sensation. Plus, there’s the added bonus that I only have five Americans left versus 35 Boxers.
Hopefully I can finish all of these before I come across a 42-pack, which I predict to be the next evolution of beer packaging now that the 36-can barrier has been broken. There’s only so much room in the beer fridge, and again, I have a weakness.
So I am guessing neither beer would of made the cut back in the day at one of your bad beer parties. Shame.
ReplyDeleteTrust me, D -- you're not missing out. Old Style tastes like gold compared to this stuff.
ReplyDelete